Keepage The opposite of garbage.
   
Key Learnings An annoying variation of "lessons learned." The recap at the end of a project of what worked and didn't worked. Intended to prevent future teams from making the same mistakes -- but they do anyway.
   
Keyboard Dyslexia Typing all the correct letters, just in the wrong sequence. Occurs most often when "dashing off" an e-mail response.
   
Keyboard Plaque The disgusting buildup of dirt and crud found on computer keyboards.
   
Knowledge Transfer To share one's unique knowledge on a subject or how something is done either by teaching or passing along documentation. Today's companies attempt to preserve that wisdom by using "knowledge databases" before it "transfers" with departing employees.
   
Krudzu Any proliferating management fad -- or simply dumb concept -- that overtakes and eventually strangles a company or organization. (Pssst! Just like the artificial plant in the Sonic the Hedgehog comics.)
   
Kudo Loop The seemingly endless e-mail loop that occurs when everyone in the office feels they must add their 2 cents to a "Great Job!" company-wide e-mail from the boss.
   
Lateral Arabesque To transfer laterally within a company to a different but equal job.
   
Lateraled To be moved sideways. As in: "I hear you got a big promotion." "No, I got lateraled."
   
Leadager A person in charge who confuses leadership with micromanagement.
   
Level Set A nice corporate-sounding term bandied around in meetings that simply means "get everyone on the same page."
   
Living Assets Employees. Also referred to as "live assets," "human capital," "resources" and "carbon units."
   
Living Document A document intended to be kept current through continuous revisions and updates. Of course, after six months everyone is sick of it and it sits ignored and unread on a server somewhere.
   
Long Pole From 'long pole in the tent,' the person or group most behind schedule, thus holding up the entire program.
   
Loop Mail The ever increasing amount of e-mail CCed or copied to you to "keep you in the loop." Most of it is unnecessary, irrelevant and a major reason why you can't get your own work done.
   
Lose the bubble To lose focus.
   
M&Ms Entry-level employees fresh out of college who fancy themselves "management material.” Their candy-coated degree looks great, but inside they melt in the heat of real work.
   
Malicious Obedience Opposite of civil disobedience. A quiet protest of company policy in which employees go through the motions of doing their jobs but intentionally accomplish nothing.
   
Management Insultancy When corporate management hires a team of outside consultants to do what it should be doing -- deciding how best to run the company!
   
Marginalienation Cryptic comments scribbled in the margins of a document that leave you questioning the author's sense of reality.
   
Meatloaf Unsolicited mass e-mail, circulated by friends or office mates via group e-mail lists, consisting of jokes, anecdotes and other trivia. Where spam is commercial, meatloaf is homemade.
   
Meeting Moth meeting moth: An executive who flits from meeting to meeting, but seldom acts on the items discussed in them.
   
Meeting Prep The pre-meeting ritual of going to the restroom and getting a cup of coffee.
   
Meta Ignorance Not knowing what you don't know. "At least I have a clue about what I don't know, but my boss suffers from meta ignorance."
   
Meta-Decision An all-encompassing, comprehensive decision based on the outcomes of several smaller decisions. "Once all of the smaller issues are resolved, we'll render a final go/no go meta-decision."
   
Microwaiting The time spent in front of the employee break room microwave while your lunch heats up. Regularly occurs a few minutes before noon and is generally not reported as a part of the lunch hour.
   
Mission-Critical Another sign that too many people in today’s business world have read too many Tom Clancy books. What’s wrong with the word "essential"?
   
Misunderestimate To seriously underestimate. Like many Bushisms (a term or phrase mangled by the president), misunderestimate is widely used (abused).
   
Mouse Milk Anything that delivers little (or at least hard to measure) payoff -- while often requiring lots of hard work.
   
Mouse Potato A person who spends hour upon hour staring into his/her computer screen. Increasingly couch potatoes are giving way to mouse potatoes. The TV Generation is losing to the Digital Generation. BuzzWhack’s not sure this is really an improvement.
   
Mousing Surface A term for those who feel "mouse pad" lacks cachet.
   
Multi-Slacking The act (or art) of performing multiple non-productive tasks at once. The best multi-slackers simultaneously can talk on the phone, surf the Web and watch TV.
   
Nerdistan Any neighborhood or community where a disproportionate number of residents work in high-tech industries. These residents also tend to have a disproportionate number of electrical outlets and phone jacks in their homes, too.
   
New Guy Gene The internal mechanism that triggers extra politeness in new employees until they're up-to-speed on office politics. Example: "The new guy is so rude. He just busted in on my conversation without a second thought. He totally lacks the new-guy gene.
   
Non-Concur Bureaucratic word choice that allows one to avoid uttering something as definitive as "disagree." The ultimate obfuscation: "Yes, I do not non-concur."
   
Offline Primarily, it’s wherever you are when you’re not on the Internet. But now it has become an office catch phrase heard frequently in meeting. "That's a great idea, but let's deal with that offline after the meeting."
   
Ohno-Second The fraction of time (slightly longer than a nanosecond) that it takes to recognize you've just goofed. The perfect example is that moment of horror when your eye spots the key in the ignition as the car door is being slammed shut.
   
Open-Air Conference Room An area outside the building where employees convene to discuss business while grabbing a quick smoke. "Let's have this meeting in my open-air conference room."
   
Operationalize A weighty-sounding buzz term preferred by consultants that simply means "put into action" or implement. "The next phase is to operationalize our strategy."
   
OT-mail An unnecessary, after-hours e-mail sent to a supervisor or co-workers with the sole purpose of time-stamping how late you worked.. Example: An e-mail sent to boss at 9:24 p.m. -- "Just wanted to touch base on the Johnson account. Let me know when we can m
   
Out of Runway The point when you realize that no matter how hard you work it'll be impossible to meet an approaching deadline. "We're just about out of runway. If we don't get those reports today, we'll never make next week's launch."
   

 
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